Understanding God.

I have found myself so frustrated with God lately. I don't understand Him sometimes and it makes me so mad. But who am I to say that I get to understand Him? No one said life is easy, but guys that doesn't mean that you give up on God and do your own thing. That is what I have found myself doing so much lately. I've finally had enough of doing my own thing and giving up on God. I and am completely surrendering myself to Him. It is one of the hardest things I've had to do, doing what God wants you to do when you want to do the complete opposite can sometimes be impossible. Honestly most of the time I don't understand Him, but I have to take a step back and realize who I'm trying to understand. God. Jesus Christ. The Maker of everything. Like that is even possible to do? Okay Paige. Ha I can be so stupid sometimes. I feel like trying to understand God is like putting his importance down a level. We're not necessarily supposed to understand Him, bottom line is that He knows what He's doing and all you have to do is trust Him. The depth of your relationship with God is up to you.

I started reading a book called "Lady in Waiting" today and it opened up my eyes to a few questions to ask myself.

• Has your faith been a lifeless ritual rather than a vital love relationship with Jesus?
• Do you know more about pleasing a boyfriend than pleasing the Lord Jesus?
• Does your commitment to Jesus cause those around you to seriously consider whether Jesus is Lord of their lives?

We serve a good God. Mmm I want to be known as the girl who was in love with her Savior. I want to be known as the girl who people said that they saw something different in me. I don't want to be like everyone else. I just want God. His plan is clearly different from the one I thought was right. It's the hardest thing to walk away from what you want. It's not easy, but that doesn't mean you shouldn't do it. God has something better. TRUST HIM. That's where I'm at. At the end of my rope, waiting, I'm done taking matters into my own plans. I'm giving this to you God.

P.S. don't forget to thank Him. For whatever situation you're in. You may not understand it. But just try to understand one thing. "He knows the plans He has for you, plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future". It's not easy, but God loves you. YOU are His beloved. be LOVED.